One of my favorite movies is "You've Got Mail". One of the conversations in the movie I love most is when Meg Ryan is confronted with a "horrible, mean" person (Tom Hanks) and can't come up with any nasty retorts to the snide remarks he throws her way. Later she emails him and confesses that she's never any good at "comebacks" in that situation. He confesses to her that being able to be "mean or nasty" isn't good either- it never makes you feel better when you tell someone off. Later in the movie, she finally gets to tell him off good and proper and she discovers that he was right - afterwards she felt terrible. It wasn't worth the glory of the moment....I find I'm often in the situation that she found herself. I never know what to say in the heat of the moment to tell someone off when they really deserve it. But, just as Kathleen Kelly (Meg) discovered in the coffee shop, being rude to people never makes you feel better, even when they deserve it!
I never like to admit this about myself, but I think deep down I am a "peacemaker". I would rather die than intentionally hurt someone else's feelings! When I was younger, I had very tough skin... it took a lot for someone to hurt my feelings. I think because of that, I can accidentally "push the line" too far with people. Sometimes my "jokes" or "sarcasm" cross the line and it's at those times that I wish I could crawl into a hole and die!
What's the point of this long ramble??? All day, I've had the feeling that I may have hurt someone's feelings, but I don't know for sure.... I just have this feeling in the pit of my stomach and I'm not even really sure who've I've offended (if it's anyone at all!) But confession is good for the soul, and maybe because I've posted this for all the world to see it will help me check my "sarcasm" a bit more and use a bit more restraint in potentially hurtful situations! Remember that old adage - Think before you Speak!
2 comments:
You've got mail is one of my favorite movies that isn't a classic or musical!! Man, I knew I liked you!
I'm catching up on some blog reading this evening. It's Fight Night so the guys (including VOR for the first time in 4 months or more) are upstairs. I felt particulary connected to this entry in your blog. We are alike in this regard -- rather die than hurt someone's feelings and he "gift" of sarcasm. My sister gave me some post it notes that say something like, "Sarcasm. Just one of the services I offer." That's me! And I too have to be aware of how far I go with it. It's easy to take it too far, and it definitely depends on who you are talking to. Some people, I have learned the hard way, just don't get sarcasm at all. It was interesting for me to read this entry about how you feel about all this. Thanks. Janine
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