Every once in a while, my kids get homesick for California. It's hard to blame them, we did live in the very best part of California that there is. Great climate, great schools, great location, great ward.... with lots and lots of kids... we had a huge Primary and Youth program... over 100 active kids. We all have times when we miss Dublin, even me... sniff, sniff...
I don't understand why, but since we've moved here my kids can't seem to make (and hold onto) any really good friends. Don't get me wrong, they have LOTS of friends... Taylor's texting bill every month proves that to be true. They seem to know everyone. All the kids seem to like them. But close friends... tight friends... even best friends... those experiences are alluding my kids. I don't know what to do about it. I really don't... and it makes me sad.
Is it too much to ask for a stalwart, outgoing family to move into our neighborhood (preferably from out of state) that has a 14 year old boy and an 11/12 year old girl? Is that too much to ask? It certainly seems like it...
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7 comments:
It's not a silly thing to pray for. That has been mine and Pacmans prayer for a while for one of our kids and finally, things are starting to come together.
i am sorry you miss Dublin and your kids are struggling. that is a heart string tug for sure!
Dublin (close to Vacaville) misses you too, I'm sure. I always think it's harder to make close friends the older you get. It was probably really easy when they were young but tougher now.
We're homesick to see you both and our four darlin's. Up for a visit from us?
And my post didn't help...
I feel for you. When we left Oregon we had lots of friends. Red had so many kids in the ward that he loved to hang out with. Now? Sigh... we feel very, very lonely.
I think it is a lot harder to form lasting friendships nowadays because 1) we are very busy and 2) we don't play or live near the same kids everyday. I see that Kate, even at 4, is having trouble with this. Just not as easy anymore unfortunately. Maybe I should introduce you to Brenda when we come to visit. Her oldest are 13 and 11.
This just goes to show the true nature of our world and its decline in human relationships and contact. More kids text than talk, more parents are detached from their kids and too busy to be with them let alone help them foster REAL relationships with others.
I don't know about others but I do in home child care and I love kids but when I have just mine home with me I am selfish and just want them...not their friends too. I feel bad telling my kids they can't have friends over sometimes but I am tired of having a chaotic house full of kids sometimes. I know it is selfish of me and for that I am sorry but it's not like their friends are banging down the door or calling non stop wanting to come over it is just my kids wanting to invite others over. Something I definitely need to work on.
I feel for you girl. I really worry about what the HS scene will be like when my kids hit it. Will the teachers even speak to the students or will teaching be done by computers...or robots??? Ha ha ha! I suppose anything is possible. Let's get a bill passed banning texting and maybe we'd get more actual conversations occurring.
Wow, that was a vent a bit...sorry I am ill and I guess a bit more opinionated about this, more than I realized.
Love ya!
There certainly seems to be a cacophony of feelings and opinions here.
I agree with Rob. Moreover, not only would we rather text someone than talk to them, how many of us really know their neighbors? I know mine, sort of. I know their names. Thats about it. I let one of them know when D and I go out of town. But we simply don't really "know" them (and not in the biblical sense people, sheesh, this is a family blog here).
On the reverse side, I think those quality friends are out there. I know when I moved here to Eureka I was taken in by what I would say are the stalwart, quality, life-long best friends that Christy is refering to.
And I understand the longing she has for her children to experience the same. People you can be close to. Not fearing being judged by them. Knowing you can call them in the middle of the night, needing their help, and knowing they will get in the car and come over.
I'm grateful for these friends, and know the benifits of having them. I hope everyone has the opportunity for the same.
I know what you are going through! Paige had to change schools to go to the new one that opened up close to our house, and we knew this was going to happen all along, but it was tough. She had 2 good years at that school, she made 2 best friends, and even now that we have been at this new school for 2 years, she has not found that best-friend yet. She jumps around from group to group. She seems fine, it is more me, I feel bad for her, I just want her to have the one good girl friend!
I agree with Heidi, my kids are forever wanting neighbors to come over, and i honestly just want my kids here, not some one elses! I would rather them all be here playing but it is nice to have just family here!
We luckily have not had to move far away from family. My family is all hear, but it has taken a few years to build back up some good friendships. I would say it is just over the last 3 years we have really gotten "friendly" with people and actully have some great family friends.
We miss you....Don't worry, they will find the friends they need!
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